Giving Care....

11.8.11 Tuesday Night

Tomorrow a National Warning Alarm will go off. Why? The first of its kind. Is it time to duck and cover? I can’t live without electricity, water, heat, fast food. Can we live on grass? Are we headed to disaster? Oh well. Back to life. Back to reality. Back to the here and now. Sounds like a song…

I love my brother. I’m mad at the VA Hospital urgent care for releasing him with high blood pressure. I’m mad at myself for being glad that they released him. He had another stroke. This stroke affected his cognitive abilities. He is happy in bed with his TV. I am thankful for that. Why do we feel guilt? What purpose does it serve? I wish I didn’t have any guilt feelings. Life is so short. I am not a good care giver. My mom died on my watch. Now my brother has another stroke on my watch. I’m not watching. But I provided something. But maybe something is not enough. Obviously.