11.8.11 Tuesday Night
Tomorrow a National Warning Alarm will go off. Why? The first of its kind. Is it time to duck and cover? I can’t live without electricity, water, heat, fast food. Can we live on grass? Are we headed to disaster? Oh well. Back to life. Back to reality. Back to the here and now. Sounds like a song…
I love my brother. I’m mad at the VA Hospital urgent care for releasing him with high blood pressure. I’m mad at myself for being glad that they released him. He had another stroke. This stroke affected his cognitive abilities. He is happy in bed with his TV. I am thankful for that. Why do we feel guilt? What purpose does it serve? I wish I didn’t have any guilt feelings. Life is so short. I am not a good care giver. My mom died on my watch. Now my brother has another stroke on my watch. I’m not watching. But I provided something. But maybe something is not enough. Obviously.
Tuesday, November 08, 2011
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Existential Scabs
You miss me? Ain’t that a little symphony….Some day they gonna ask what ever happened to me.
Get the wheel let’s go for a ride. If you’re troubled then I’ll follow you down.
Last night was alright….I wanna see you again.
Does anybody have a light? I need to get right.
I’m not satisfied living by the airport in Queens…
My dogs are barkin’ Your cats are hissin’
My climbing the big mountain all alone is wrestling LeeLou when I’m buzzed. I’m taking my life in my own hands. It feels good. I wish she would grab my juggler vein and get it over with.
Not really.
Life is good.
LeeLou hair is all over my black T-Shirt. That’s not so bad considering if I were to climb a mountain in Alaska, my nose and feet would freeze off and then I’d die a slow death. I suppose the view would be much better, though.
My first cousin is dying. He is old and expected to die. But it is still a strange thing to do. Die. We all must die. Makes me want to live.
I think it’s time to travel the great U.S.
Then on to the rest of the world.
Why not?
Why?
I’m no good and I like it. The end is coming soon.
Maybe it’s time to begin or end picking at existential scabs.
Get the wheel let’s go for a ride. If you’re troubled then I’ll follow you down.
Last night was alright….I wanna see you again.
Does anybody have a light? I need to get right.
I’m not satisfied living by the airport in Queens…
My dogs are barkin’ Your cats are hissin’
My climbing the big mountain all alone is wrestling LeeLou when I’m buzzed. I’m taking my life in my own hands. It feels good. I wish she would grab my juggler vein and get it over with.
Not really.
Life is good.
LeeLou hair is all over my black T-Shirt. That’s not so bad considering if I were to climb a mountain in Alaska, my nose and feet would freeze off and then I’d die a slow death. I suppose the view would be much better, though.
My first cousin is dying. He is old and expected to die. But it is still a strange thing to do. Die. We all must die. Makes me want to live.
I think it’s time to travel the great U.S.
Then on to the rest of the world.
Why not?
Why?
I’m no good and I like it. The end is coming soon.
Maybe it’s time to begin or end picking at existential scabs.
Wednesday, February 02, 2011
River Rats
I recently enjoyed walking down main street up and over the levee to the great Mississippi River bank to look for treasures. This little walk (really not so little) made me feel alive again. I kept thinking of Huck Finn. I am now a River Rat. My fellow River Rats are Barry and John. I took a picture of John in a tree with moss hanging down behind him and the river and sand-bank in the background. He is going to use it as his CD cover and give me credit for the photo. He sings and has a producer. He is a true character.
I found a lot of treasure…so much so that I could carry it with me on the long walk back. I found a big plastic Folgers’s coffee container full of bacon grease. I emptied it and washed it out in the River and filled it with broken glass, bottles, spikes, etc. I had to go back the next day with bags and pick up my little treasure piles up and down the bank. Comrade River Rat John is going to show us some more areas to look for stuff. As soon as the weather gets better, we will be hitting the banks again.
I found a lot of treasure…so much so that I could carry it with me on the long walk back. I found a big plastic Folgers’s coffee container full of bacon grease. I emptied it and washed it out in the River and filled it with broken glass, bottles, spikes, etc. I had to go back the next day with bags and pick up my little treasure piles up and down the bank. Comrade River Rat John is going to show us some more areas to look for stuff. As soon as the weather gets better, we will be hitting the banks again.
Friday, January 28, 2011
A Beautiful Day in Random Oaks
The sun shone today. I walked around the yard. LiLou did too. I went to the grocery store and enjoyed the drive. Great nieces came over today at different times and played with LiLou. She enjoyed them. She's been pretty bored lately.
I'm looking forward to my trip to Minneapolis, MN. I ordered some long johns and some boots.
I want a personal image consultant. I want to look cute, but comfort trumps cute. I'm a T-shirt blue jean tennis-shoe girl. Make-up only when necessary.
I resent the fact that men don't have to wear make-up..... I know, women don't either, BUT.
Today is the 1st birthday of my grandson, Ethan. 80 more to go.
I'm on my out. Being 50 something is a brand new experience. I am older now than Barry was when we married. I thought he was old. I think I'm old, too. But these 80 year-olds who ride the gambling bus think I'm so young!
Sometimes I think nothing matters. Then I think everything matters.
A little bit of smoke in the sky....it's late in the evening...the end of a summer burns upon your skin...it's never too late to cry.....sleep with strangers...show you things that you've never seen....far below the city burns....... (The Twilight Singers)
I'm looking forward to my trip to Minneapolis, MN. I ordered some long johns and some boots.
I want a personal image consultant. I want to look cute, but comfort trumps cute. I'm a T-shirt blue jean tennis-shoe girl. Make-up only when necessary.
I resent the fact that men don't have to wear make-up..... I know, women don't either, BUT.
Today is the 1st birthday of my grandson, Ethan. 80 more to go.
I'm on my out. Being 50 something is a brand new experience. I am older now than Barry was when we married. I thought he was old. I think I'm old, too. But these 80 year-olds who ride the gambling bus think I'm so young!
Sometimes I think nothing matters. Then I think everything matters.
A little bit of smoke in the sky....it's late in the evening...the end of a summer burns upon your skin...it's never too late to cry.....sleep with strangers...show you things that you've never seen....far below the city burns....... (The Twilight Singers)
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
The World Through You
I am so infatuated with David Fonseca. If I had a poster of him, I'd put it on my wall. When I put my headphones on and listen to him I feel as though he is in my soul.
I had a good day today. Went to the Habitat Restore and bought some stained glass and two planter pots. The stained glass is temporarily sitting in my kitchen window. It reminds me of the 70s. It's brown triangles. Barry and I had a fun impromptu visit with John Russo on our way out of town. I got to pet his Raccoon and one of his dogs. He gave me some glass and two rose headed spikes. I got to see the Cedar Grove outhouse in his backyard. I met his girlfriend who knew all of Barry's relatives. It was so much fun visiting with them. John wants to recreate the Cedar Grove Barn and play a film that he wants Barry to narrate for visitors. Sounds fun... Cedar Grove is the plantation that Barry grew up on.
I cooked pepper steak tonight. Since Ronnie is living with us now, I cut up a jalapeno pepper and threw it in the mix (he loves them)... and I ended up having to wash my eyeball out with water after touching it with my fingers.
While I was fixing Ronnie's plate he rebuked the asparagus saying it's FULL OF GOUT!!!!!! I laughed and reminded him that he is taking gout medicine and that it has uric in it, not gout. :)
I pulled all my plants out of the game room today and put them back outside into the wonderful sun. I am looking forward to Spring. I have plans for my area of the yard. Lots of stuff and plants.
I'm also just about ready to call Rob Kember to tear out my kitchen and recreate it.
I now have a rear view mirror on my desk so that I can see Ronnie sneaking up on me.
Loving my headphones. And David.
Later.
I had a good day today. Went to the Habitat Restore and bought some stained glass and two planter pots. The stained glass is temporarily sitting in my kitchen window. It reminds me of the 70s. It's brown triangles. Barry and I had a fun impromptu visit with John Russo on our way out of town. I got to pet his Raccoon and one of his dogs. He gave me some glass and two rose headed spikes. I got to see the Cedar Grove outhouse in his backyard. I met his girlfriend who knew all of Barry's relatives. It was so much fun visiting with them. John wants to recreate the Cedar Grove Barn and play a film that he wants Barry to narrate for visitors. Sounds fun... Cedar Grove is the plantation that Barry grew up on.
I cooked pepper steak tonight. Since Ronnie is living with us now, I cut up a jalapeno pepper and threw it in the mix (he loves them)... and I ended up having to wash my eyeball out with water after touching it with my fingers.
While I was fixing Ronnie's plate he rebuked the asparagus saying it's FULL OF GOUT!!!!!! I laughed and reminded him that he is taking gout medicine and that it has uric in it, not gout. :)
I pulled all my plants out of the game room today and put them back outside into the wonderful sun. I am looking forward to Spring. I have plans for my area of the yard. Lots of stuff and plants.
I'm also just about ready to call Rob Kember to tear out my kitchen and recreate it.
I now have a rear view mirror on my desk so that I can see Ronnie sneaking up on me.
Loving my headphones. And David.
Later.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Up or Down and Why?
I live with two males.
Does putting down the commode seat still have meaning?
If so, what does it mean?
Is it a display of respect to the lady using the same commode?
What is a lady?
What is a gentelman?
Why should men put the seat down?
Should women put the seat up for men as a show of respect?
If not, why?
I miss walking into the bathroom and finding the seat down.
I don't like to put the seat down.
I don't like touching it.
Maybe men don't like touching it either.
Perhaps this is why urinals in houses are installed.
I'm wondering if these men I live with don't respect me, or are they oblivious to commode seat protocol.
Just a thought.
Does putting down the commode seat still have meaning?
If so, what does it mean?
Is it a display of respect to the lady using the same commode?
What is a lady?
What is a gentelman?
Why should men put the seat down?
Should women put the seat up for men as a show of respect?
If not, why?
I miss walking into the bathroom and finding the seat down.
I don't like to put the seat down.
I don't like touching it.
Maybe men don't like touching it either.
Perhaps this is why urinals in houses are installed.
I'm wondering if these men I live with don't respect me, or are they oblivious to commode seat protocol.
Just a thought.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
First Louisiana Post
Barry is on the screened-in porch smoking a cigar and reading a magazine. Ronnie is watching football in his room. LiLou is sleeping at my feet. It's a beautiful day (Saturday). High 50's and sunny. I'm getting caught up with my blogspot account. Earlier I was working on putting together mine and Alice's trip to Minnesota next month in the heart of winter. It was -1 degrees this morning there. I think I should buy some warm undergarments for the trip. We will be at the Mayo Clinic for minor surgery on Alice.
I enjoy living in Louisiana. I realize now that it would have been nice to live in a lot of different places before I die. Too late now, I guess.
Tiffany has been living with Wes and Yanilsa for the past 5 months and is doing well. Josh is living with Judy in Hallettsville and doing well, too.
Jacob landed a great job as controller to many different business entities.
Nathan moved into Ronnie's house with Brandi and the kids and is currently waiting on some union ironwork to open up.
Our first Thanksgiving apart from the TC house was a success in The Colony, TX at Wes' house. I am offically the elder now. I accept this new role for me with mixed feelings. I miss being the child sometimes. I do not miss being the one incharge, at all! It was nice to show up, eat, do a few dishes, and leave. Barry and I stayed at Jacob's nice house in Frisco, TX. He and Kristi were wonderful hostesses. I love them.
I made dressing and a green jello salad thingie in their kitchen. Jacob provided me with my own little keg of beer for stress relief :)
We travel to Cleveland, TX a lot to our place in the woods. LiLou LOVES it up there, and I do too. I'm looking forward to spending some time there this Spring.
I am currently infactuated with David Fonseca and I'm learning Portugese because of it.
Later...
I enjoy living in Louisiana. I realize now that it would have been nice to live in a lot of different places before I die. Too late now, I guess.
Tiffany has been living with Wes and Yanilsa for the past 5 months and is doing well. Josh is living with Judy in Hallettsville and doing well, too.
Jacob landed a great job as controller to many different business entities.
Nathan moved into Ronnie's house with Brandi and the kids and is currently waiting on some union ironwork to open up.
Our first Thanksgiving apart from the TC house was a success in The Colony, TX at Wes' house. I am offically the elder now. I accept this new role for me with mixed feelings. I miss being the child sometimes. I do not miss being the one incharge, at all! It was nice to show up, eat, do a few dishes, and leave. Barry and I stayed at Jacob's nice house in Frisco, TX. He and Kristi were wonderful hostesses. I love them.
I made dressing and a green jello salad thingie in their kitchen. Jacob provided me with my own little keg of beer for stress relief :)
We travel to Cleveland, TX a lot to our place in the woods. LiLou LOVES it up there, and I do too. I'm looking forward to spending some time there this Spring.
I am currently infactuated with David Fonseca and I'm learning Portugese because of it.
Later...
